Thursday, March 24, 2011

Sister Wives Need Not Apply

*DISCLAIMER - this is totally a copycat post based on Mrs. Hyde's blog post.  You can find it here. Please click, it's an excellent blog and a really great post.  I just have a different perspective on it.*

Okay, so I watched this show on TLC or discovery or whereverthehell it was last week for the first time ever.  I know they have been doing this for months, maybe years.  I've just always managed to have something else to do or watch when it was being aired.  This past, whichever night it was, I actually sat through an episode.  Wow.  

Let me just get this out of the way to clear it up.  I'm not about to go all 'Christian judgey' on anyone.  Not my style.  If it works for them, more power to them.  I personally think it is a huge waste of the area's police and DSS resources to investigate them.  He isn't breaking any laws that I can tell.  He is legally married to the first wife and she is simply allowing him to have 3 mistresses besides.  

I have a number of issues with it and questions about it.  The issues are just mine because I am one seriously jealous bitch.  I'm good with plenty of things, Darling Husband has always been an incorrigible  flirt.  He likes women and women like him.  I had to learn to deal with it.  He's curbed his nature somewhat but it doesn't change the basic fact that, like me, females are completely charmed by him.  However, there are a few things that are just for me.  Like his cock.  It's for me and only me.  

So most of my questions and bizarre curiosity are centered around their sex life. Surely that isn't a surprise to anyone.  I mean, how do they determine who he sleeps with?  Do they have a calendar that says wife one gets him on Sunday and Thursday night, wife 2 on Tues and Sat, wife 3 on Wed and Friday and when the hell does that leave for wife 4?   Oh, Mondays, of course...what was I thinking?  

Now assuming that none of the women are 'into' one another, that brings up a whole 'nother question.  If he just happens to be being affectionate with one  of the wives and they get all hot and bothered, is it cheating if they proceed and it isn't her turn?  

My other problem with polygamy is that it all centers around the man.  Why should so many women be content to share a single cock?  What if I wanted brother husbands?  Three of them could go out and earn good livings so we would be financially secure, the other one can stay home and help with domestic projects around the house.  At night I would have my choice of 4 penises.  Because every one is different, sometimes I would go with the sensitive one who makes sweet gentle love to me, sometimes I would go to the one who likes to play freaky deaky role playing games with me, some times I would go to the one that likes to be dominated, and sometimes I would go with the one who just likes to prop me on my knees and do me doggie style.  Whatever my fancy at the time.  

Fortunately for me, Darling Husband thinks that having more than one wife would surely be a nightmare (he lives with me y'all don't - he would know).  But just for fun, I asked him how he would feel about brother-husbands.  How would he feel about sharing me and my affections with other men.  He's really not feeling that at all.  I guess that settles it.  We are a one man, one woman household.   


  1. Hehe, this is why I don't entertain the idea of a threesome. I can please one woman just fine. But two? I don't know if I can, er, multitask that well.

    And that's just sex. Living together on a regular basis? Unless they were all little lemmings and kept their opinions to themselves, I'd grow weary FAST.

    And no, I don't look for a sheep as a partner. I love my girl because she is my intellectual sparring partner. I just don't see how this could ever work successfully...

  2. Semi...I told Mrs. Hyde that I'd have to kick the other sister wives asses as I'm a rule the roost kind of person. If I wanted sex and it wasn't my night, I'd be livid. I'm liking your Brother Husband theory though.

  3. Can't stop laughing. I watched one of those shows. And, yes, they do have a schedule! And they say that it doesn't bother them when he's with another. One woman said she appreciates nights she can count on to sleep alone and undisturbed.
    As for multiple hubbies, BFs, etc. all I can say is, imagine them all having a cold at the same time, and continually pestering you about where their socks are and what's for dinner. :)

  4. Lost - I knew you were an enlightened man. Smart men know that there is no way to control or please more than one woman at a time. Unless they are sheep. I mean, if the women are sheep that's their biz, but I'm not a sheep nor are most of the women I know.

    Barb - the brother husband theory is a good one. I mean I know there is more to it than the sex part, but it's a nice thought.

    Li - Good gods, Lady! Not 4 men with a cold!!! Or heavens forbid...a stomach virus! Egads! I'm not a great caregiver so I'd probably just toss them some Dayquil or Pepto and tell them to get on with it already.

  5. While your perspective is different from our lovely Mrs. Hyde's, I have to say I am inclined to go with your view on having brother husbands. There is no way I would share my man's cock with some other bird. And why not have several men go out and provide for the family long as they leave the best looking one who is the best in bed at home for me to enjoy ; )

    PS: I'm in the Thank Q for Common Sense blogging tournament. Today is the last day to vote and I could really use your support. Link on my blog today. Thanks a bunch!

  6. I bet the two skinny ones are the ones he bangs and the two bigger ones are the ones doing cooking/cleaning. lol

  7. i saw the first couple episodes when they aired & then forgot about it, so i think i'll go watch some more on demand. i sort of like the idea on paper. cuz i don't mind laundry, but i hate cooking. and i really don't feel like having sex all that often, so in theory, i think i could work with some sister wives as long as they don't expect me to cook for them & all their little rug rats.

  8. no way i want more than one woman. ever.

    well...unless it is a -no-way- my- wife- ever- finds- out- threesome...with very hot alien chicks!

    and as much as i love my guypackmates...i do not ever! never! ever! want to share with them ANY woman...yucky...

  9. totally stole my sequel post on brother husbands. Damn those great minds thinking alike! BTW, I'm all for it. Bring on the penises!

  10. Emps, I totally support you in anything you do!!! I went and voted. See I knew that brother husbands could be a popular and viable way of life. We could be reverse gender polygamists.

    OT - I was thinking the same thing! I'm so ashamed to admit it. However being an...ahem...full figured woman myself I'm really glad that Darling Husband still likes it.

    Sheri - I realize that not all woman have the sex drive that I do. In fact I have a couple of friends who swear they would rather mop the kitchen floor (WTF??) so perhaps for them it could work. They could get the security of being in a relationship, share the responsibilities and not have to worry about the 'chore' of sex. Hmmm...I just can't wrap my brain around the idea that sex is a chore. *grin*

    Bruce - I love your sci-fi sex fantasy. And I do appreciate your point of view on sharing honey pots. Seriously....yuck is right.

    Mrs. Hyde I'm so sorry that I kifed your sequel post! You need to annouce that there is one coming so the rest of us know. Great minds and all that. Bring on the penises indeed. Not just any penises would do. Wouldn't you require proper inspection of said anatomy? "Oh you're nice and all. Now drop trou and let's have a look."

  11. re: brother husbands. would it be like that scene in 'history of the world' where empress nympho chooses her escort for the nightly orgy?

  12. How do they have enough money? Do they share one penis AND have to work? I'm telling you that if I had to share the only penis I get, that better be one damn good looking, wealthy penis!

  13. Ha! I like that! But when you're wife number 1 I think you delegate everything. either way....I do not want to share my husband, but I don't want three either. They can be just as bad as women!

    Bruce's alien fantasy kills me! LOL!

  14. ZOMG!!! Steph - it would be exactly like that in my mind. Oh, and I love the quicktime march too. *devil*

    Nari - if it were a penis attached to a handsome AND wealthy man I might consider it, but I think that because I didn't get enough love as a child I would still begrudge any affection shown to anyone but me. It just wouldn't work for me. good to see you. I think if I were delegating everything I would assign someone to laundry and someone to the kids homework and someone to scrub the bathrooms...I love cooking so I would keep that...but bedtime is always my time. *devil*

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  16. I've had a few interesting encounters with more than one person...and to be honest they're just never as good as TV. You live and learn I suppose :)

  17. Why should you be forced to pick? Choose all of them. :P

  18. Great post - and you supported your position very well! I haven't read Mrs. Hyde's take on this - maybe I'll head over there and take a read!

    But suffice it to say, I'm in your camp when it comes to sharing Willy! Not happening on my shift - which is the 24/7/365 shift, if you get my drift!

    Now as to being the filling in a well stacked man sandwich - another story all together!

    Cheers, Jenny